A Tribute to TaliaJoy18

Just weeks ago.. I got to know this awesome little girl through bubzbeauty tweets. She was so pretty, so mature and so inspiring. Her name was Talia Castellano and she was 13. 

She had been battling with cancer for 6 years... and on 16 July 2013... She had earned her angel wings. Despite that, she left her accomplishments and experiences here to help others. In her short span of living here on Earth... she had accomplished so much... She is truly an amazing girl. 

Talia Castellano. Picture with credits to Angels for Talia Facebook Page

For the past weeks... I thought of her every single day.. We weren't related in any way... not even geographically close.. but her never-giving-up spirit, her passion for make-up, the way she looked at life... was so great that I could feel it right here. 

Goodbye Talia. You were one amazing girl.. If heaven is a place that I could still get to know people whom I've never met on Earth.. I would love to get to know you. (:

A Tribute to Cory Monteith (AKA. Finn Hudson)

To the actor whom have brought smiles to fans/viewers of GLEE.. Thank you. 

Cory Monteith & Lea Michelle (picture with credits to source below)
(http://www.wetpaint.com/glee/articles/lea-michele-and-boyfriend-cory-monteith-how-long-have-they-been-dating)

sucked into the world of self pity

"When life gives you lemons... make lemonade out of it..." says one inner voice..  

"You are pathetic.. why do you live?" says the other.  

Who am I, really, to say that I have a sad life... when I have a place to call home, food to satisfy my stomach... with basic necessities all covered? On top of all that, I have a complete family... and my friends...

For the past week.. I have been drowning myself in self-pity. "Am I not good-enough?", "Why am I rejected?","I don't think I deserve to be treated this way.", "Why doesn't my family understand me?", "Why can't they just believe in me?" A bunch of "whys..." and "me.".. Self-Pity. 

Perhaps my sister was right.. I disappointed my mum... and most of all, I disappointed myself. I had so much believe in myself... but I couldn't fulfil whatever goal I had in mind. I had too much ego in me to take this humiliation. (I had always been an egoistic bastard anyway.)

& now the question... How do I move on from here? ... ... ... 分からない。

"how's life?" "uh.. liddat lor"

Every gathering/catch-up session with friends... this question is bound to emerge: "so... how's life?" 
I seem to have reached the age where all your guy friends would be talking about 'Army', 'Enlistment', 'POP', 'ORD'.. etc.. etc... and all your girl friends... 'University', 'Work', 'Colleagues'... you get the drift... 

My answer to that question would always be... 'huh.. like that lor.' in a typical SGrean slang.. AKA Singlish. 

Being neither here nor there... honestly, there isn't much I can talk about these days... I'm neither in the army... nor am I accepted into the Universities.. 'Sandwich' would be the best word to describe my life, for now. Frustration... Anxiety... Envy... Just losing hope in general.

My heart feels so burdened these days.. I don't want to think nor talk about it.. not at all.. but my personality disallows that. Till the day I receive something from SMU or Uni of Melb... Till the day I find another temp job. Till the day I solve my own financial crisis.. till... forever. My mind never seem to stop thinking. If only there was a switch off button in the system. 

I am in need of closure. There are too many things going on.. I just can't seem to relax and just go with the flow. If only... somebody could give me an answer to all these questions... If only... 

It's Official... I'm a NP Graduate!

23.May.2013... marks the day I graduate from Ngee Ann Polytechnic... Been waiting for this day since 3 years ago... but now that its here... I can't help but have mixed feelings... 

Well... It pretty much signifies that my soul is free once again.. not belonging to any institute, not having any identity. 
It also signifies the beginning of yet another chapter.. wherever I would be. 
Needless to say, it also signifies the moment where friends embark on their own paths... where "we" become a memory. 

All the best to fellow graduates! I'm sure all of us would have a great future in front of us...! (:

rants from a broke little girl

"去抢银行的钱算了"...

お金が大切知っても。。。I know I can't be dependent on older siblings/ parents all the time for sponsorships  for family trips, food and what not just because I'm the maknae in the family. That's a given... 

But being all calculative with me when first of all, I'm already repaying using whatever salary I earned for the month (every single cent of my salary, I don't even keep some for myself to spend)... don't you think its a little overboard...?

... just ranting. 

BLUE MOON WORLD TOUR (CNBlue Live in SG)

Just last Friday (13 April), CNBLUE was rocking the SG Indoor Stadium with their vocals and instruments... from ballads to rock music. I.WAS.THERE.


Surprisingly, I came to realise that it was my first SG-based concert that I have ever attended. Pretty sure that it won't be my last since B.A.P Live on Earth concert is coming to SG on the 12th of June 2013. Back to topic, I gave my all as a fan-girl, screaming my lungs out, singing to songs I was more familiar with, though sitting throughout the entire concert was a little anti-climax to me. WHY would anyone sit through a k-pop rock concert? WHY? o.o Makes me wonder if its just a Singapore thing. However, I must say, the fanclub coordinated events was really impressive. (:


During 'Lovelight', fans used their phone's flashlight and created a twinkling star effect amongst the sea of blue lights. (disclaimer: the following picture belongs to rightful owner stated on pic. )

Credits on Picture. - CNBLUESGFC 

Isn't it just so pretty? I happened to read about it before the concert, so I downloaded the flashlight app... (was glad I did and had an opportunity to participate in it. (: thank you CNBLUESGFC)

The initiative that I really liked and was impressed about the most was the paper project. If you had been reading fan-accounts or some press reviews of the concert, there were many volunteers going around the stadium, hours prior to the concert, distributing an A4 paper that wrote '보고 싶어요' which means 'I've missed you' in Korean to all concert-goers.

It was supposed to be used during one of the songs.. Unfortunately, it didn't happen as the setlist was slightly changed. So, I thought perhaps it wasn't going to happen. BUT THANKFULLY, the paper had its purpose fulfilled.

During the very last song of the concert, 'Try again, Smile again'... YongHwa spotted one of the fans holding the paper, and mentioned '보고 싶어요(BoGoShiPoYo)' to Boices. Everyone seems to know that that was the perfect time to use the paper. I think YongHwa was caught by surprise and touched when he saw the entire stadium holding it up. He repeatedly said that he was going to come back here to Singapore and that he loved Singapore. (Watch it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XtixdiRmt5Y)

Not mine. Credits to rightful owner...

Not mine. Credits to rightful owner... T-T 

That was truly... my favourite part about the fan-support initiatives... It was a great night. (:

I'm loving CNBLUE even more after the concert, I strongly believe they are a really nice, family-bonded band. (: CNBLUE HWAITING!

- to my friends reading this... no, my no.1 group is still v6 (J-pop) and will always be. If you're wondering why I haven actually blogged about V6 Oh! My! Goodness! Live Tour 2013 which happened earlier than CNBLUE's BLUE MOON WORLD TOUR, that's because I have already done so in my v6 only blog - http://starz04.livejournal.com/ - (: Love you! & Meet up soon!